Oh Lord. Oh God. Jesus!

As you might have gathered by now, the best girlfriend and I are currently on a little road trip through the Mid-West of the United States of America. Starting in Washington D.C., we drove to one of my alma maters, the wonderful Case Western Reserve University in Cleveland to meet some friends, before continuing to Ann Arbor, home of the University of Michigan. Thanks to our trusty Lincoln Town Car, the hours on the road were rather pleasant, but there was a slight problem with finding an appropriate radio station to listen to (the best girlfriend ever really can’t listen to typical fordiebianco lala for hours and there is no NPR in West Ohio). We would hit the ‘seek’ button, and not only one, but up to 5 christian stations would appear in a row, informing us in a typical condescending way how to live our life. Some highlights:

So you had a sterilisation and now you feel guilty about it. Just stay abstinent for a few days every month, to tell the lord that you have changed.

Do you really think that Einstein’s knowledge impressed the lord? Do you really think that YOUR advanced knowledge impresses the lord? Maybe your knowledge impresses the Devil, and you should repent.

So, in a nutshell: Having sex when your sterilised and having a degree is unchristian. Does that mean that the nation should have a lot of stupid babies? China and the rest of the engineering hotbeds of the world will fall over laughing. Mind you, none of the wonderful people we have met in the last 4 days have ever listened to this crap and actually really fear for their country. The opposing polarities this society is creating are scary beyond belief. Charles Murray’s ‘Coming apart’ was right in every aspect: there are now two wildly diverging parts of this society, and looking at the current Republican caucus and the spectacle of the presidential elections, I think I know who’s winning.

Praise the lord. And repent. For reading this.

Now.

Or else.

Oh Americans, how lucky you are.

And so it has started again. The best show on earth has started to rumble into gear again, swallowing thousands of journalists, creating millions of pages of print, thousands of hours of TV and keeping the nuttiest bloggers on earth in business (and, of course, giving Rupert Murdoch the chance to poison another 59 million minds by ramping up Fox News coverage and spreading his “neutral and unbiased” opininions over 5 continents). Yes, it’s the American Presidential elections, and this year could be an especially brillant one. If we’re really, really lucky, some of the nuttiest right-wingers ever could turf it out among themselves, turning the whole process of the Republican primaries into one giant freak show that is likely to be more entertaining than anything that Aaron Sorkin has ever dreamed of writing.

The prospect of Newt Gingrich, Sarah Palin and Michelle Bachmann slugging it out on a stage while Mitt Romney looks on grinning is just too exciting to contemplate, and I envy the nation that has the pleasure of witnessing this thoroughly entertaining process every 4 years. Here in the UK the best we can hope for is one aspiring Labour/Conservative/Liberal candidate calling the other one ‘spent’.

So I raise my glass to you, the happy citizens of the U.S. and especially to Sarah, Michelle and Newt and with baited breath shout

“Bring it on!”

The Antichrist?

While doing the dishes (definitely a man’s job in this household. By choice!) I listened to Matt Frei’s excellent ‘Americana‘, a weekly collection of odd stories from that most entertaining of all showbiz variants: American politics. After Newt Gingrich pretty much confirmed that he will be standing for president in 2010, Frei then proceeded to interview domestic security guru Richard Clarke, who astonished me with the little snippet that according to a Harris PollĀ 24% of Republicans believe that Barack Obama is the ‘Antichrist‘.

Gosh.

I don’t know what’s worse about this factoid, the amount of rabid religiosity this displays or the sheer stupidity. With Sarah Palin and the Tea Party movement gaining momentum, Newt Gingrich looks positively desirable as the next republican candidate.

As someone who lived through the beginnings of his ‘Contract with America’ I never thought I would ever write this.

Welcome back to the World, United States of America

While the world is celebrating, there are still some die hard conservative air heads in the U.S. that didn’t get the memo: ‘Oiltrader’ in the comment section of the New York Post writes:

“My family and friends will never accept this criminal and terrorist lover as our President….. The entire world will just laugh at him and more importantly all of us for being so stupid as to elect a man like this….. Lets hope that the rest of the non-idiots in this country share our thoughts and intentions and show everyone everywhere that this man will never have a thing to say as President, but will only be a token figurehead…. NOTHING MORE!!!!!!”

Well, he’s right in one aspect: the world IS laughing, and it’s because we’re relieved and overjoyed. 8 years of disastrous foreign policies, the stoking of the hellfires of the Christian fringe and hapless fiscal policies are now over.

The world is once again ready to embrace a responsible, enlightened and proudly liberal United States, happy to be inspired by its stupendous creativity, multicultural society and technical brillance.

Welcome back, Americans, the world applauds you.

Well done.

Bigot of the week

If you have ever doubted that there’s something significantly wrong with the Christian right in the U.S., this should once and for all make you afraid. Very afraid:

” If we were living in a biblical society, homosexuality would be punishable by death so such a school would be unnecessary. Although I’m against the special accommodations, perhaps this new trend of segregation will protect straight kids from these predators. With any luck, some radical will blow up the gay school.”

So much for the benefits of homeschooling.

update 22.10.08 18:00: seems like the offensive entry has been removed by Blogspot.com after relentless flagging of the reddit community. Well done. The offensive entry can sill be read here, though.