Grand Designs, Grand Dames.

While I despise most property-improvement shows, I do have a soft sport for Kevin McCloud’s Grand Designs which is well written, entertaining, well researched and never boring. But recently I am asking myself how Kevin choses his victims: the houses seem to be getting more modernistic (apart from that ghastly project in which the Addams Family met a Glasgow housing estate) the ladies seem to be getting er, more, rubenesqe, outspoken and challenged by fashion, while the husbands have been more ithyiotic: gasping for financial breath and observing their wives burning the money and driving the project.What does that tell us about Kevin’s tastes (in houses and ladies)?

Living in New Zealand: a mixed bag of nuts

As I am writing this, I am sitting in a train taking me from Edinburgh to Aberdeen towards my new home in Scotland. After six years living on and off in New Zealand, it feels disconcerting to be surrounded by so many people, looking up into a sky that has a dirty gray color that the sky in North Otago never had. The trains are filled with drunken revellers, there are hardly any animals out on the fields, and there seems to be a lot of trees around. As dairy farmers in New Zealand see trees as a pest that has to be removed immediately as soon as the dairy conversion starts, I am sure there is a connection. Not with the drunken revellers, though. But at least Scotland has some sort of public transport, even if its full of happy drunks.

New Zealand is by most Europeans seen as some sort of distant paradise, a view reinforced by the New Zealand tourist board’s clever marketing and Peter Jackson’s editing skills.For some reason it’s rates still on the top five of every German one day to visit New Zealand. They associate the place with clean streams, green hills, cavorting hobbits and funny brown people who rub their noses on theirs as soon as they (the tourists) touch kiwi soil.

Indeed, if you follow New Zealand’s branding efforts around the world, you have to marvel at the advertising industries’ ability to sell this small piece real estate in the South Pacific as the most desireable place to be in the whole world. While there is a grain of truth in the whole branding effort, it conveniently misses out on numerous issues that the discerning traveller from Pigsknuckel, Arkansas is probably not aware of.

Over the next weeks I will be trying to give an honest evaluation of what it’s like to live in a country with a savaged environment, a racially divided society with violence and crime issues that the rest of the would have nightmares about all set in a little paradise that can deliver an unequalled quality of life.

If the Kiwis wouldn’t be hellbent on destroying it.

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The best bar in New Zealand. No discussion.

It’s not easy to find a good bar in New Zealand. Some of them are swamped with tourists (especially in the big hotels), some have terrible staff and some completely forget to stock local fare. But there is one place that just feels right. New Zealand’s best bar is hiding here:

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Indeed. Within this rather unassuming driveway is a treasure called Pequeno to be found. Hidden away in a rather unassuming small court yard (that, if I am not mistaken, featured in Perfect Creature) behind a simple door with only a small sign telling you that you’re in the right spot. (I feel almost ashamed by giving it away). Once you enter you are being greeted with a comfortably furnishe, ca 70 square meter room sporting black leather seats and sofas, a fire and a nice, long bar.

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Very knowledgeable, polite and friendly bar staff that remembers their guests after the second visit serve classic cocktails, a good collection of single malts, local beers and an excellent collection of pinot noirs from Central Otago.

The music, both live and canned is unobtrusive but well chosen, ranging from classic lounge to jazz. The prices are acceptable for a location of this quality, but not prohibitive. The crowd is a pleasant mixture of students, academic staffers and local professionals. It rarely gets uncomfortably full and most of the time oozes a luxurious, relaxed vibe.

Without doubt the best bar in New Zealand.

A Pentium II as a multimedia machine.

Last week one of my coworkers – let’s call him Ainsley – asked whether I had a small stereo in my large collection of electro junk that I was able to sell him. Unfortunately, apart from a cheap chinese clock radio there was nothing I was able to offer. Knowing that the only PC in the house just left with one of the kids to university, I suggested a small form factor pc as multimedia centre and source for music and to keep in touch with the kids.

Cost was a big issue, so as I had a boot full of recycleables anyway, I dropped by the Waitaki Resource Recovery Park and chose from a large heap of old and dusty PC a small little number that still sported a motherboard and a Pentium II. From a heap of PCI cards an D-Link ethernet card and an ISA sound card was quickly chosen. Cost: 7 NZ dollars (ca 5 US dollars/ 4 Euros).

I took the little dusty thing home, de-dusted it, plugged it in: nothing. Not a beep. So I exchanged the Power Supply Unit with one of the old ones that were lying around my own pile of electro rubbish and was rewarded with an angry beep by the mobo. Fortunately the friendly proprietor of Small Bytes Computing in Oamaru had his own pile of elector junk and 2 168 pin DRams were found and these 192 megabytes stopped the motherboard from making shrieking noises. An old keyboard and an old serial mouse were found as well, and I even had a nice NVIDIA AGP card from what must have been 2000 lying around.

The motherboard is an ‘Atrend’ ATC-6130. I presume Atrend doesn’t exist anymore, as I couldn’t find any evidence of it on the web, but there was a large amount of drivers and bios updates floating around, so the old thing was updated in no time. The bios was set to 1998, so that had to be changed, and USB support is rather patchy. Nevertheless: an old 5 Gigabyte seagate HD and an even older optical drive was found in that big pile of old hardware, and surprisingly the little computer booted easily into Damn Small Linux.

The question is of course, which operating system to run. Even with 192 MB of Ram, Ubuntu is a bit heft. Geubuntu is (while certainly a technical marvel) plain ugly with its golden theme and eye candy. Damn Small Linux is too geeky to use for a user who can barely find the start button on a windows machine, and as I wanted a Debian based distro (I’m not particularly good with the other distros) I went for Xubuntu. Thanks to Envy (doesn’t Alberto Milone look smouldering on that picture) and Automatix the little thing was set up in no time and is now able to play MP3s and CDs (unless you distract it with other hard disk activity) and it even attempts some frames of a flash movie on MP3. A flawed machine, no question, but able to email, play music and surf the web.

All for 17 dollars.

An EEEPC under the Christmas Tree (look what I did there!).

Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukah, Wonderful Id and a great Divali. And for the Atheists out there, have a lovely couple of days off (unless you’re a policeman/nurse/doctor/fireman/prostitute/priest/sysadmin/dj/environmental engineer/prime minister or any other profession that’s needed during the holidays).

The best girlfriend ever found an EEEPC under the christmas tree yesterday evening (well, to be correct, it was hidden in her handbag because that’s where it’s going to live). Until two weeks ago I had no clue what to give that precious woman, until, while surveying the current laptops on offer, she declared “they’re all far too chunky. I want something that fits in my handbag and that is easily taken to meetings where it obstructs the deskspace”. She was already using a G4 Ibook, knew about the existence of my own MacBook (that was still too large) and frowned upon Blackberries, TabletPCs and those terrible Windows Mobile devices. Sensible woman, she is.

So the only option was the OLPC really. But then it looked rather childish, had garish colours and would not make a appropriate item in the boardroom. The EEEPC, on the other hand, had traditional laptop looks, was white, just as affordable and featured everything a female geek by osmosis could want. So the EEEPC it was.

When the little box was delivered to my workplace, the response was impressive: I was immediately surrounded by a gaggle of nurses (or is it a flock of nurses?) who wanted to touch it, take it home with them and there was definetely swooning going on. Even one of my rather ungeekish male colleagues wanted to touch it, open it and made positive grunting noises about its size, keyboard and weight. So, the first test was passed with flying colours. Then the big moment: the discovery of the item on Christmas eve (which is when we get our presents, like proper people). When the best girlfriend ever opened her handbag to look for something unrelated, the Eee (which is how I’m going to abbreviate it) was found in the handbag’s depths with the comment: ‘that’s not mine!’. Then slow dawning of realization happened and enthusiastic noises were made, even euphoric yelps were heard. Later, after an enormous dinner and generous helpings of red wine I actually got my freshly washed fingers on it as well and was immediately taken aback by it: for a bloke of my hand size, the keyboard is certainly a bit on the small size, and the 800×480 screen would probably annoy me after more than thirty minutes.

But that’s were the difference lies: the best girlfriend ever is unlikely to use it for more than short bursts (not everybody spends half their waking time online) of online activity, and it certainly seems to be perfect to browse the net, email, write and listen to music. One 2 GB SD card will hold all the music and data that she will ever need outside work, and for movies these can be replaced easily be her in-house geek.

Here’s a picture of her reading E2:

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A complete and utter success.

Merry Christmas.