On the way to a non-descript place in the vicinity of London, the lady in front of me entertained the whole carriage with her exceedingly loud mobile phone conversation. As this was obviously meant for public consumption, here some excerpts:

‘My agent tried to get me into *average roaming theatre company name here* for a touring production, and they shortlisted me right to the end, but I didn’t get it. Gutted.

….

I was supposed to play a cop in a film with a shootout in the end, but the director’s funding was pulled, so he will give me a call in summer.

….

I am using my mother’s car, so my poor mum is carless while I’m driving around with it.

….

My friend was gutted when after the fifth recall didn’t get into *brainless west end musical name here*  and now he’s doing ‘normal’ work now.

I don’t know, but somehow being an actor doesn’t sound much fun.